2007-01-01 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, we humans have one big cerebral cortex.

2007-01-02 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, the cerebral cortex is different for everyone.

2007-01-02 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they're all tasty in jambalaya.

2007-01-02 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, brains are carriers of spongiform antipathy.

2007-01-04 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, this makes the brain feel nice and soft!

2007-01-04 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the brain-gnomes got tired of hardly being able to walk around their own homes.

2007-01-04 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they are just as capable of crawling or rolling as walking.

2007-01-04 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, the gnomes will roll out of the holes.

2007-01-04 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, this has greatly relieved their host's sinuses, and even improved his balance!

2007-01-04 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, this caused him to overcorrect in his walking and sent him tumbling into a group of teenagers.

2007-01-05 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, these teenagers never noticed him tumbling toward them.

2007-01-05 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, none of them braced themselves against his impact.

2007-01-05 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, the guy had a gay old time tumbling into the group of teenagers.

2007-01-05 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the teenagers were all vampires. No, really.

2007-01-05 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, the man had a habit of bathing in garlic and onion soup.

2007-01-05 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, the man had major body odor that took away the smell of garlic and onion soup.

2007-01-05 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the teenagers' non-vampiric parents were watching the teenagers.

2007-01-05 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, they had forgotten their aerosol deodorant in their respective houses.

2007-01-05 [iippo]: Fortunately, it was flu season and everyone's respective noses were too stuffed to smell anything.

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, this means that they couldn't smell that the man was actually a zombie in disguise!

2007-01-06 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, they had the survival kit against zombies.

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the survival kit was child-proof, and the teenagers, being vampires, would never, ever grow to be of legal age.

2007-01-06 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, the teenagers had an emergency adult in a glass case, to handle the child proof kit.

2007-01-06 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, the glass was shatter proof and sealed so well, the teenagers had no way of opening it

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the adult in the case was a renowned tenor, who could break it by singing.

2007-01-06 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, because of a previous event, which is secret, the adult had become a mute.

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, one of the teenagers knew the secret!

2007-01-06 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, that teenager was also a mute.

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, that teenager was also psychic enough to tell the adult to cope with his dang problem and git singin' his dang song!

2007-01-06 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, the zombie was prepared for this and waited intently to eat the adult.

2007-01-06 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, when the adult began singing, his song turned out to be a bar room fight song, which incited an impromptu mosh pit that kept the zombie up on teenage shoulders.

2007-01-06 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, all this bouncing around caused the zombie to disentegrate all over the teenagers and make a huge mess.

2007-01-06 [iippo]: Fortunately, all those teenagers were part-time cleaners in Wal-Marts and knew how to handle an emergency like this.

2007-01-06 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, they'd only ever been able to test their zombie-mess-cleaning on their company's executives, never normal people.

2007-01-09 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, this zombie had not been a Wal-Mart executive, and therefore was not composed of hazardous waste.

2007-01-09 [Anninja]: Unfortunately, there were two Wal-Mart executives around when the zombie blew up, and they blew up, too.

2007-01-09 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they were Wal-Mart executives when they blew up. People cheered.

2007-01-09 [Samael_22]: Unfortunately, this caused a chain reaction across the world, where all Wal-Mart executives blew up, and the store had to close down.

2007-01-11 [iippo]: Fortunately, before it closed down, all the products in the stores were given to the poor, which helped them in very many ways.

2007-01-11 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, the empty stores became strongholds for various C-rank supervillains across the world. DC Comics was swiftly put out of business, as most of its bad-guy collection appeared in reality.

2007-01-16 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, this also enabled most of the good-guy collection from DC comics to appear in reality.

2007-01-16 [iippo]: Unfortunately, the reality-versions of the characters differed somewhat from the comic book versions: the villains were nowhere near as cool as in the comics and the heroes were all more interested in getting laid than kicking ass.

2007-01-16 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the Marvel comic heroes had already been in reality long enough, that the appearance of the DC villians and the poor competition of the DC heroes gave them lots of jobs.

2007-01-16 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, despite DC's endless lines of suckitude, it still had Batman, and thus, was nigh-unstoppable.

2007-01-16 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, there had already been enough Marvel vs DC fights, that the two groups of heroes had had enough of that and decided not to bother each other.

2007-01-17 [iippo]: Unfortunately, this didn't apply to the villains who did battle each other.

2007-01-18 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, this didn't go well with Hell, and Spawn was born to attempt to end the battle with the villains.

2007-01-18 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, there is no exiting Hell... muhuwahahahahaaaaaaa!

2007-01-18 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, Spawn lived in a suburb of hell called Belgium, where he ingested many Belgians and Belgian waffles.

2007-01-18 [iippo]: Unfortunately, those Belgian waffles gave Spawn a heart burn. He went to the doctor's who discovered that he had a cancerous growth in his abdomen.

2007-01-19 [Samael_22]: Fortunately, the cancer was caught right away, and Spawn was able to undergo cancer treatment.

2007-01-19 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, they discovered that the cancerous growth was actually a member of a German heavy metal band, who Spawn had accidentally swallowed during a drunken Oktoberfest binge.

2007-01-20 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the beer was awesome!

2007-01-23 [Annie]: Unfortunately, the band was drowned in all of the beer and eventually digested.

2007-01-23 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they sounded better after they came back out than they did before!

2007-01-23 [iippo]: Unfortunately they sounded so good that everyone wanted to listen to them so badly that they just dowloaded the band's music as MP3s through limewire and the band didn't get paid, ever again.

2007-01-23 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, this forced them back into the indy scene, which prevented them from selling out and writing pathetic, uninteresting, uncreative trendoid crap.

2007-01-24 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, their indy music was still uninteresting and uncreative. This led to their re-signing by a large corporate record label.

2007-01-27 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, this saved all of the people who thought they enjoyed indy from having to listen to their music.

2007-01-29 [iippo]: Unfortunately, this roller coaster of fame and hate drove the band members into a cult, and they committed group suicide naked under the blue moon.

2007-01-30 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, a passing amateur writer saw them and wrote a screenplay about it, thus guaranteeing himself a place in the annals of history.

2007-02-03 [iippo]: Unfortunately, the screenplay-made-into-a-movie just made the cult even more popular and crazy misguided kids in the thousands followed in the band's footsteps and committed naked group suicides.

2007-02-03 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, the band ran out of crazy misguided kids. That said, they decided to start writing anti-naked-group-suicide songs, which were very well received by their only remaining audience; elderly women and politicians.

2007-02-04 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, they were dead, and couldn't actually pull it off, because ghosts really aren't into that sort of thing. The elderly women and politicians could listen to their songs because elderly women are almost dead anyway, and politicians all have one foot in hell by default. (oops, i am not PC. apologies)

2007-02-08 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, the Wal Mart officials came to visit from the other side, to warn the politicians of their possible fate.

2007-02-27 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, the politicians didn't listen to them, and thus the land became more and more corrupt, and the world was rife with war.

2007-02-27 [iippo]: Fortunately, this only lasted for about a year and then everything kind of turned out just alright, and a lot of people could see in retrospect that all the horribleness and the catastrophes were really a part of the bigger plan to make more puppies happy in the world.

2007-02-28 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the cats, rats, and pot-bellied pigs were now subjected to live under numerous social disadvantages due to the puppies' unjust elevation.

2007-03-02 [iippo]: Fortunately the cats, rats and pot-bellied pigs didn't really mind, as long as they were just left to their own devices and weren't bothered.

2007-03-02 [Mister Saint]: Unfortunately, the puppies soon demanded virgin sacrifices from the cats, rats, and pot-bellied pigs. They were told that the olive oil must be extra, extra virgin when it was sacrificed.

2007-04-01 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, three great leaders arose from the groups, and these three leaders united their respective followers, and began to stage a reolution against the unjust rule of the puppies.

2007-04-24 [Annie]: Unfortunately, when the revolution had finished and the puppies had been overthrown, the rats turned around and created a regime exactly like the puppies' regime - except now they demanded cow sacrifices in order to please the dairy gods.

2007-04-27 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, there were plenty of cows available, since Wal Mart's recent collapse had led to a decrease in McDonalds burger sales.

2007-04-28 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, all the cows had strange and assorted diseases due to genetic experimentation by Wal Mart and McDonalds in a failed attempt to make cows that had many-flavoured meat.

2007-05-13 [PaperPencil]: Fortunately, these series of strange diseases made all the remaining habitants of this little world realise that killing was not the solution for their problems and a new start had to be made to change things around.

2007-05-15 [RiddleRose]: Unfortunately, at this point, all of the humans had been so messed up by the genetic changes in their food that they had become dependent on strawberry flavoured cow meat.

2007-05-18 [Kiddalee]: Fortunately, there had been a tribe of naturopaths and anti-consumerists hiding out below the Earth's crust under the midwestern USA, who, over time, had mutated to a form perfectly capable of consuming every kind of people food still left on Earth.

2007-05-19 [iippo]: Unfortunately, as these naturopaths and anti-consumerists emerged to populate the new world, the sun's radiation burnt their skin and they all took on the resemblance of lobster.

2007-05-19 [Mister Saint]: Fortunately, they were not Middle-aged Mutant Rasta Lobsters (tm), but the more typical Lobster Ahso type with the long hair.

2007-09-10 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, they all got the munchies.

2007-10-17 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, the rats decided that these strange lobster-creatures made excellent pets, so they fed them the cow sacrifices and gave them little fluffy things to play with.

2007-10-23 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the Lobster Ahso type humans with the long hair hungered after the rats.

2007-11-02 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, the rats had been secretly developing a superstrength laser with which to subdue uprisings.

2007-12-18 [iippo]: Unfortunately, there was a power-outage and the laser was out of use.

2007-12-19 [RiddleRose]: Fortunately, they had a giant emergency battery, put aside for just such an occasion.

2007-12-28 [Kiddalee]: Unfortunately, the giant emergency battery began leaking battery acid all over the planet.

2012-05-16 Sarah: Hey girlie! I'm sorry to hear that you won't be wrtiing here anymore, but I totally understand. I've been so caught up with school and other activities that my blog has fallen by the wayside a bit, too. However, I'm also finding new ways to explore my passions like you are through your new job (which, by the way, I would love to visit). I look forward to your new website! Good luck; I know that you will succeed in whatever you choose!Mandiee P.S. I would love to go to Inn Season with you soon! Now that my college apps are done, I'm freeeeee .